and this is what it's come down to

I figured out the pivotal reason for my lack of blogging lately.

I try too hard.

And not just at blogging, but at everything; at keeping my friends, at school, everything. Okay, the "at school" thing could be argued, but nonetheless, I always have the need to be... Interesting.. Impressive, even. And as it turns out, I'm just NOT that interesting OR impressive. I want to be better at everything than everyone, and if I suck, I will try hard as hell to beat you until I find something else I want to be better at so I give up on whatever it is I'm trying to get better at and I start on something new.

And it just never fucking ends.


I don't know where I'm going with this. I wish I were better. Get better.

at a loss for words

I hate how I can never express what I really want to say.

This blog is junk.

so classy, so posh.

This is another one of those times where a lot of things have gone down, but I'm just either too lazy or incapable of putting them into words. Summer has been bitchin'. I made friends. Finally.